Those who are regulars over at GBM know that James Vaughan is our pop culture guy and music reviewer for covers. He is almost a YouTube promoter at this point! But this one…well, come in to read for yourself!
Literally Grasping At Australian Straws
WARNING: Offensive Racist Lyrics | Abuse of a corpse | Language | Racism
We are sorry for any offence with may cause. The article revolves around other lyrics of the song.
Biters, I have another song lined up, and you’ll be surprised! It’s an original song and not a cover. With that said, I hope you feel limber because I’ll be reaching and stretching for this musical number.
Oh! Spoiler! Warning for how the stinger of how the song ends. Since it is why I wanted to share it with you all.
With that out of the way, today’s song is 1962’s Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport by Rolf Harris.
Comparing Vampires And Corcodiles
Now on the surface, there is nothing really gothic about this song. It’s about an Australian stockman talking about his animals. Yes, super gothic, I know but did I mention he is dying?
Aside from that minor detail, let’s see just how many of these straws I can grasp to make this old-school hit darker than it is.
LYRICS
There’s an old Australian stockman lying, dying
And he gets himself up onto one elbow and he turns to his mates
Who are all gathered around and he says
Watch me wallabies feed, mate
Watch me wallabies feed
They’re a dangerous breed, mate
So watch me wallabies feed
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Keep me cockatoo cool, Curl
Keep me cockatoo cool
Ah, don’t go acting the fool, Curl
Just keep me cockatoo cool
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
‘N’ take me koala back, Jack
Take me koala back
He lives somewhere out on the track, Mac
So take me koala back
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
And mind me platypus duck, Bill
Mind me platypus duck
Ah, don’t let ‘im go running amok, Bill
Just mind me platypus duck
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Play your didgeridoo, Blue
Play your didgeridoo
Ah, like, keep playin’ ’til I shoot through, Blue
Play your didgeridoo
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tan me hide when I’m dead, Fred
Tan me hide when I’m dead
So we tanned his hide when he died, Clyde
And that’s it hangin’ on the shed!
Altogether now!
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
Tie me kangaroo down, sport
Tie me kangaroo down
The Parallels
Much like the vampire craze in the nineties with Blade and Buffy, and then its resurgence with movies like Underworld and even Twilight, there was a big Australia fad back in the day.
In the late ’80s, Paul Hogan’s Crocodile Dundee was the man. Just like people needing to know if you were team Edward or team Jacob, it seemed everybody wanted to be an Aussie. They wanted to pet koalas and wear Dundees hats complete with the gator teeth trim.
KaZaA vs. iTunes, What?
The other loose straw I’m grasping at this review is Rolf himself. It wasn’t until recently that I saw his picture. I was first introduced to this humorous song through a media sharing network called KaZaA—think iTunes but free.
My stepdad looked for songs he grew up with and could no longer find in stores. So the only thing I knew of Rolf was this little file of 1s and 0s featuring his voice.
Having recently wanted to revisit this song, I turned to YouTube. There was an album cover with his picture in the video. Finally, seeing what the singer looked like made me think of a few depictions of Dracula‘s crazed manservant Renfield. He just needed to rock a bit of bedhead and the hunched-over Igor walk to complete the look.
It Was A Different Time…Still No Excuse
Ok, Biters, enough straw grasping and beating around the bush. Let’s look at those lyrics. There are really only two I want to look at. They are both near the end of the song.
At first, I thought he was telling his buddy Lew to just ‘let his elbows give out’ since he was dying.
Well, I was wrong. The Australian accent got in the way, and the actual line was ***“Let me Abos go loose Lew,” which would take us back to Renfield and Dracula. Our song’s narrator used Australia’s First Nations people as indentured servants, much like the relationship of our gothic duo.
Now for the lyric that landed this song on GBM’s radar! Ready for the main event?
Life’s A Bitch Then You’re Leatherfaced
Our dying cowboy asked his mate Fred to ‘tan his hide.’
“Tan me hide when I’m dead, Fred. Tan me hide when I’m dead.”
Tie Me Kangaroo Down Sport by Rolf Harris
Biters, I can take this line a few ways. Maybe the stockman wanted him to finish treating some leatherwork, tanning hides. Or not wanting to look ghostly pale and corpse-like after death, to be hit with some bronzer.
Fred is doing precisely as told: skinned his friend upon his death. He then Jovially went back to singing the song’s chorus like it was nothing. If that doesn’t warrant some level of goth credit, I don’t know what does.
Rolf takes this humorous last verse the extra gothic mile when he did it alongside The Beatles in what I guess was a jam session where he rewrote the words.
Giving each member their own special verse, this time, when the narrator died, not only did Rolf have the poor guy skinned, he went full Leatherface and turned him into a new drum set for Ringo.
That’s All Folks!
Well, Biters, that is all I’ve got this go around, so if you want a small laugh and a “new” tune to be stuck singing for the next week and a half, maybe check this 60’s throwback out.
© Gothic Bite Magazine 